There are certain subjects we are all sensitive about. When forced to talk about them, we often reveal some of our unhealed psychic wounds. It seems money and achievement are such things for me. I felt like I came across as both a braggart and an embarrassed underachiever when I wrote you about my current and future prospects. Can we start anew? What you need to know is that I'm an excellent long-term investment. And that I love with a full heart. I truly believe that character is far more important than one's current circumstances. Of course, being the romantic I am, I will never abandon hope that the right woman will grasp the full picture.
What I mean by this is that I believe myself to be deserving of a certain caliber of woman. And I don't want to settle for anything less. But I fear that I might not be able to attract the kind of woman I want because I haven't yet achieved the level of success I feel I should have. Success breeds confidence. And success feels like it's a long way away right now. The burnout I've experienced on the road to a Ph.D. has been enormous. And the psychic fallout has been particularly damaging. Is it normal to be afraid of failure? Of course. Completing a dissertation is the hardest thing some people will ever do.
I think that many of the hardest goals to achieve require a phenomenal amount of fortitude. I think for me, completing this dissertation is like eating a giant ice burger. And that's all I have to say about that...
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